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    August 31

    幸福有没有虚幻

    近来嗜睡。午觉醒来,三点的阳光清凉凉的,晒在我裸露的肩上,心中若有所动。外面侄女送的那只小鸡咕咕叫了几声,我起身抓了把米喂它。它很警惕的观察我,我也转身观察它。它已经把我的葡萄踩扁了,把辣椒也狠狠糟蹋了一把,不过,我看它很神气,心里也有一点安慰。菜园里只剩辣椒,抗病能力弱的小白菜长得有气无力的。风吹着,很令人怀旧的风。季节感,生活感纷乱乱地一起袭来。我决定出门办几件小事。
    回来的路上,已经五点半了,看到三三两两的人慢慢地似乎沉思地走在前面,天热的时候,人迫于热浪的淫威,走路总是没有诗意的,但眼前的这一位妇女,拎着番茄和几只馒头,却像在风景中。一个骑自行车的男人也拎着馒头在前面慢慢地扭。不玩了。伤感潮涌。菜种子也丢到一边去了,回家打电话。“喂……,看到人家的男人拎着菜回家……生活感多强啊,你那破工作天天都半夜……”挂上电话,觉得自己可笑,怀孕后娇气得理直气壮,矫情到无边无际。这个温柔的黄昏,自己慢慢享受一下,慢慢找到通往灵魂的通道吧。只是因为心里涌起的那一点点尖锐的复杂滋味,就以为已经习惯不了被伤感,被忧愁吞噬的又痛又快感的体验了,实在有点可惜了狠狠感动的这难得的机缘。
    记得我还是很依恋孤独并思索的快乐。生活将身躯和头脑都养得懒惰。快迟钝得厌食了。
    很快他回家了,原来心里真的很挂念呢。于是利用工作间隙的这两个小时,我们散步去种子店购买了香菜和菠菜,乌白菜四季青种子。走去走回。回来时,天暗了,我坐在院子台阶上有一句没一句听他打电话。鸡已经飞到伞上面去了,收好了翅膀,阖上了眼皮……东边的池子里,落了花瓣的荷花顶着莲蓬有点影影绰绰的味道。电话打完了,我们出院子,我带上院门,拉住了他的手……(附上荷花一朵。自种自拍。)

    Comments (4)

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    Olive GAOwrote:
    燕姐,很美的花、很美的生活呢~~
    Sept. 4
    Miaoen Guwrote:
    燕姐有孩子啦,祝福祝福,好好养身体哦~~
    Sept. 1
    哇,还能自种荷花,真羡慕……
    Sept. 1
    岑 陈wrote:
    幸福的姐姐~!
    Aug. 31

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